Funnys

The place to find and post your jokes... Typically uncensored !!
User avatar
Gibo
Posts: 517
Joined: Thu Apr 30, 2015 8:02 am
Location: The Hill
x 148
x 22

Re: RE: Re: Funnys

Postby Gibo » Mon Apr 11, 2016 8:25 am

Neckshot wrote:
Brads wrote:Appropriate and true
[img]http://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20160410/b168eb8da2521f1cef36352cd98f2714.jpg[/img]


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Is that your writing Brads? Can't quite tell as its not written in cryon :P

Sent from my GT-I9195 using Tapatalk


The very first word is the giveaway :lol: it would be two if it was the sheepshagger
1 x

Dundee
Posts: 839
Joined: Mon May 11, 2015 12:08 pm
x 30
x 39

Re: Funnys

Postby Dundee » Mon Apr 11, 2016 8:47 pm

Fark off Brads this pc is to slow to upload with photo bucket at the mo........i'll be back :lol:
0 x

User avatar
Happy
Site Admin
Posts: 701
Joined: Tue Apr 21, 2015 5:23 pm
Location: Central North Island
x 127
x 116

Re: Funnys

Postby Happy » Fri Apr 15, 2016 7:40 pm

After no dates or sex for 5 yrs a woman goes to see chinese expert sex therapist Dr Chang.He says "harro! take off all your croase, get down & craw reery reery fast to otherside room"
She does as asked,
"Ok craw reery reery fast back"
As she did Dr Chang shook his head.
"Yr probrem vewy vewy bad, worse case Ed Zachary disease I ever sor, dat why u get no man"
She says "god, what the hell is Ed Zachary disease?"
Dr Chang says.
"its when your face look Ed Zachery like your bum.":)


Seriously oldie but goodie
0 x

Spook
Posts: 16
Joined: Mon May 11, 2015 7:25 pm
Location: Mt Motutapere

Re: Funnys

Postby Spook » Sun Apr 17, 2016 11:31 am

Been told before but i will tell it again.

I was sitting on my bed pulling off my boxers when the wife says "Please don't do that to the dogs".
0 x

User avatar
Gibo
Posts: 517
Joined: Thu Apr 30, 2015 8:02 am
Location: The Hill
x 148
x 22

Re: Funnys

Postby Gibo » Mon Apr 18, 2016 12:38 pm

:shock: he's back!!
0 x

Spook
Posts: 16
Joined: Mon May 11, 2015 7:25 pm
Location: Mt Motutapere

Re: Funnys

Postby Spook » Mon Apr 18, 2016 5:49 pm

When i was about 12 my mum snapped me jerking off in bed, she said "You should save that for when you are married", so i did and when i left home i had 4 Agee jars to shift.
0 x

User avatar
Gibo
Posts: 517
Joined: Thu Apr 30, 2015 8:02 am
Location: The Hill
x 148
x 22

Re: Funnys

Postby Gibo » Wed Apr 20, 2016 11:16 am

Spook wrote:When i was about 12 my mum snapped me jerking off in bed, she said "You should save that for when you are married", so i did and when i left home i had 4 Agee jars to shift.


:o
0 x

User avatar
Happy
Site Admin
Posts: 701
Joined: Tue Apr 21, 2015 5:23 pm
Location: Central North Island
x 127
x 116

Re: Funnys

Postby Happy » Sun May 01, 2016 6:14 pm

Left two Warriors tickets on the dash. Some fucker broke in and left four more


image.jpeg
You do not have the required permissions to view the files attached to this post.
0 x

User avatar
Rushy
Site Admin
Posts: 1966
Joined: Wed Apr 29, 2015 8:08 pm
Location: Halfway up a hill on the true right of the Kaipara River
x 1
x 73

Re: Funnys

Postby Rushy » Sun May 01, 2016 6:26 pm

They just won Happy. They will need to put a sidecar on the bus.
1 x

User avatar
Happy
Site Admin
Posts: 701
Joined: Tue Apr 21, 2015 5:23 pm
Location: Central North Island
x 127
x 116

Re: Funnys

Postby Happy » Wed Jun 22, 2016 4:10 pm

A dog lover, whose dog was a female and 'in heat', agreed to look after her neighbour's male dog while the neighbours were on vacation.

She had a large house and believed that she could keep the two dogs apart. However, as she was drifting off to sleep she heard awful howling and moaning sounds,
rushed downstairs and found the dogs locked together, in obvious pain and unable to disengage, as so frequently happens when dogs mate.

Unable to separate them, and perplexed as to what to do next, although it was late, she called the vet, who answered in a very grumpy voice.
After she explained the problem to him, the vet said, "Hang up the phone and place it down alongside the dogs. I will then call you back and the noise of the ringing
will make the male lose his erection and he will be able to withdraw."

"Do you think that will work?" she asked.

"Just worked on me," he replied.

-______________________________________________________________________________

A woman wakes up during the middle of the night, as she did not find her husband in the bed next to her.
She puts on her dressing gown and wanders around the house looking for him.
Finally, she finds him sitting at the kitchen table with a hot cup of coffee in front of him.
He appears to be in deep thought, just staring at the wall. She watches as he wipes a tear from his eye and takes a sip of his coffee. 'What's the matter, dear?' She whispers as she steps into the room. The husband looks up from his coffee, "I am just remembering when we first met 20 years ago and started dating. Do you remember back then?" he says solemnly. The wife is touched to tears thinking that her husband is so caring, so sensitive. "Yes, I do" she replies. The husband pauses. The words were not coming easily. "Do you remember when your father caught us in my car?" "Yes, of course, I remember!", said the wife, lowering herself into a chair beside him. The husband continues. "Do you remember when he shoved the shotgun in my face and said, 'either you marry my daughter, or I will send you to jail for 20 years?' "I remember that too" she replies softly. He wipes another tear from his cheek and says... "I would have been released from the prison today..!!!"
0 x


Return to “The Funny Farm”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest

cron
Website by RAZOR Web Design